Willing

I was getting ready to pull out of my parking space. It had been a trying few minutes with my kids in tow. My daughter had spit up on me for the third time that hour and my son was being three in the presence of adults, and although I knew they all understood, the embarrassment was still present.

As I put the car in reverse, I looked behind me and caught such a beautiful sight. My son, with his beautiful life-filled eyes, looked at me from his car seat and stretched out his arms. His smile silently asked me a question. I hesitated, but just for a moment, and decided his request was so worth it.

So I put the car in park, opened the door and went around to where my sweet boy sat buckled in and gave him the hug he so desired from his mommy.

I don’t always stop. I don’t always take the time. But I’m glad I did today.

Dom arms reached out

Choose

Blah.

That’s how I’ve been feeling lately.

Doctors visits.

Car rides. Said vehicles breaking down. More car rides to get Marshall to work and home from work all while toting the 3 year old and the infant. Out the door before 8…back through the door after 5.

Evaluations. Forking over money.

More miles in the car.

Tears. Three year old melt downs.

Thirty four year old meltdowns.

Jobs that should be loved suddenly become loathed because it means getting dressed and showering and facing another day when keeping the covers over my head sounds better.

More doctors visits.

Hemangianomas.

Kidney reflux.

Plagiocephaly.

Lots of Web MD’ing.

More three year old fits.

More thirty four year old fits.

Snow. Ice.

And then sunshine.

There’s still more miles to be put on the car. Still more doctors’ visits to be had. More money to fork over.

But the decision is mine to believe that life is still beautiful. That there are blessings to be had in car rides. There are lessons to be learned in waiting rooms. There are people to be shown kindness and occasionally be the recipient of said kindness.

It’s not all bad. There’s actually a lot of good.

It is then that I begin to see my circumstances not through the lense of a rose colored variety but through the promise that although the winter has been way too long…

spring. is. coming.