On our traveling adventures to Texas, Marshall and I had the opportunity to make a pit stop in Atlanta to visit with some dear friends of mine. We played games well into the night and then said our goodbyes to depart to our hotel. Early the next morning we awoke, took advantage of the complimentary breakfast and shortly were on our way. Not without the morning paper in hand, however. While perusing the paper, I came across the infamous Dear Abby* column. The first letter read as follows:
I am trying hard to rebuild my marriage. My husband and I have three young children.
Four months ago I met a man (I’ll call him “Jack”) who made me feel like I haven’t felt in a long time. We have not slept together. We tried several times to stop seeing each other, but unfortunately my attraction to him was too strong.
This week my husband and I separated. I saw Jack this morning. Before things went too far I told him I had herpes. Abby, he practically had a heart attack- and ended it on the spot!
The thing is, what I said wasn’t true. I just could not think of another way to make him stop being available so I could concentrate on my marriage. I feel like such a coward, and I am heartbroken.
Not only do I miss Jack terribly, I also cannot bear the thought that someone who made me so happy would just turn his back on me.
Would there be any point in telling him that I lied, or did I do the right- albeit cowardly – thing?
Wavering in the South
Did you catch what I did?
In the opening paragraph Wavering states that she is trying hard to rebuild her marriage. By seeing a guy named Jack? Doesn’t sound to me like she wants to rebuild anything with her husband! And then when she lies and tells him she has a disease he splits! Instead of realizing how stupid her actions were and seeing his real motivation when he drops her, she wonders if she should call him and make amends!
What took place to bring this woman, with a husband and three small children, to a place where she was willing to throw it all away for the love of a man who quickly deserted her at the suggestion of difficulty?
It’s hard to take a paragraph’s worth of information and answer these questions. There is so much between the lines of which we are unaware. How was her relationship with her husband before “Jack” came into the picture? How did her husband treat her? How are the children dealing with mommy and daddy being separated? Where are her friends?
My heart is broken for her situation, but I am all the more determined to guard my relationship with my dear husband. Will there come a time when I feel that Marshall is no longer meeting my emotional needs? Is it possible that a man will come into my life and start showing that attention that I often take for granted that Marshall gives?
What is more important, however, is how I react to such situations. If the time comes when the love of my life is not as “exciting” as it used to be, will I go to my Heavenly Father for a solution or will I seek out a “Jack”?
If “Jack” comes waltzing into my life, how will I respond? Will I flee even the appearance of evil or will I cave?
With God as my rock, I will seek to cherish my relationship with my husband as the finest of precious gems. Becoming one is a life long journey that God designed to move forward and not go backwards. And it must be guarded.
I am so thankful that you brought Marshall and I together as husband and wife. I love him so much and desire no one but him to complete me on this earth. Help me, Father, to guard my heart and flee even the appearance of unfaithfulness.Thank your for our journey. Be with us and guard our marriage. Touch Wavering right where she is in this moment. I pray she would be introduced to your love and that her marriage be restored. In the name of Jesus I pray these things. Amen